Light of My Life
by blindasabat
Summary: After working a difficult case, Goren visits the love of his life.


**Light of My Life**

Disclaimer: I do not own the character of Robert Goren, who is the only CI character in the story.

Summary: After working a difficult case, Goren visits the love of his life.

Robert parked his car and walked out slowly toward a grave in the middle of the lonely cemetary. It was simply decorated; pink and red roses. Robert kneeled down and pulled out weeds that had collected there for the past several months. After he had disposed of them, he stared at the gravestone and took a deep breath. He read and re-read what it said:

Cameron Margaret Goren

Born July 4, 1995

Died August 1, 2001

"Her prescence and laughter

lit up the room,

but her smile lit up

my life."

-Unknown

Robert had put off coming for a long time. He had to work. He was busy. He was tired. It could wait another day. He didn't know what he would say, but he started anyway.

"How are you, baby girl?"

As Robert spoke, memories filled his mind. Cameron, three years old, crying over a skinned knee. Cameron, at two, very dirty after playing outside. Cameron, nine months old, taking her first steps toward him.

He remembered the only thing he regretted about Cameron: He never spent enough time with her. He had to work. But raising a child on his own was not easy.

That was not an excuse, he realized. He could have made it if he had worked less.

"I'm sorry, baby."

Robert talked to Cameron a little longer. Soon, he heard something behind him.

"Daddy!"

Robert turned toward the sound. He couldn't believe what-no, who- he was seeing.

"Cameron?" he asked breathlessly.

For the first time in almost two years, the little girl who'd been the center of his life was there with him again. She was in a red, white, and blue dress. It was the dress she'd been buried in.

Cameron walked up to Robert and wrapped her arms around him. The hug was soft and gentle, but full of warmth and love. Cameron let go and looked at him with happiness. She had the smile on that Robert remembered very well. But then the smile faded and was replaced with concern. She put her hands in his and asked,

"What's wrong, daddy?"

"What do you mean?"

"You're crying."

Robert couldn't help but smile. In life and in death, Cameron, though she didn't know it, could gauge his emotions pretty well.

Before answering, he took a moment to take in her appearance. She looked exactly as she had the last time he'd seen her. Beautiful, short, curly brown hair. Green eyes. She looked nothing like him.

_Is this really my kid?_ Robert thought.

"I'm happy to see you, baby."

Cameron's smile returned, and Robert was reminded of why he had put the verse from the poem on her grave. He couldn't help but smile too.

"Then why are you so sad, daddy?"

Robert saw he needed to answer her honestly.

"I'm sad because I miss you, sweetie."

"But I never left."

Robert was about to argue, then he realized she was right. For a long while, he had felt as if someone were with him nearly everywhere he went. He was relieved to know he wasn't crazy.

Cameron walked over to him with arms spread out. He picked her up and held her tightly. Before long, Cameron told him sadly,

"Daddy, I have to go."

This dismayed Robert. His rational mind knew that this whole experience not physically possible. It was just a dream. But he also knew he didn't care.

"Sweethart, don't go."

"Daddy, I have to." After a moment, she asked him, "Do you remember what you told me when Snickers died?"

At first, Robert didn't know what she was talking about. Then he remembered the dog he'd adopted before Cameron was born. It had been run over when Cameron was three. She'd been devastated. Then he realized what she was trying to say. Doing something Robert would never forget as long as he lived, Cameron put her hand to his heart and said,

"Daddy, as long as you never forget me, I'll be right here."

Robert's smile returned. About 100 yards away, he saw a small crowd of children.

"Who are they, sweethart?"

"They're my friends."

Cameron looked at them longily. Robert saw he had to let her go for good.

He turned Cameron to him. He took a deep breath. Letting his baby girl go-finally-would be the most heart-wrenching action he'd ever have to take.

"I could never forget you, baby. Go on with your friends."

Cameron's face again lit up. Robert was struck by the gladness he felt that she was happy. Maybe now, he could move on.

Cameron wrapped her arms around Robert and he returned the gesture gratefully. Before letting go, Cameron said,

"I love you, daddy."

Robert's heart felt like it might shatter into a million pieces. He desperately wanted Cameron back. Holding back tears, Robert said,

"I love you too, baby."

Cameron walked over to her friends and dissappeared. Dream or not, Robert broke down bitterly. The split second before Cameron dissappeared, he saw the darkness that had plagued his life for the past two years visually lift away. And he saw why: the light of his life hadn't gone out. It had only been dimmed. So, collecting himself, Robert took one last look at the gravestone, made an air kiss, and left.

THE END

A/N: I should probably note that I have never seen a full episode of CI. I watched about half the show, but something came up. I loved it! So, if anyone wants to know when this story takes place in relation to the show, I don't know yet. So I decided to play it safe and stick with my favorite character.


End file.
